you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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