Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
