if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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