He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
