try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
