almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
