i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
