Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
