Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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