Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
She's like a pop up book from hell.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
