happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
