D3 body, D1 cock
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
