I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
