Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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