He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
