dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
