More tranny stories later!
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
