if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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