i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
