You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
