I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
