we have officially lost it.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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