I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Randomize