We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
