Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
