Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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