she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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