How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
