is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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