it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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