she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
