The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I FOUND THE LEGS
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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