But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
