Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I have fence marks all over my body
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
