are you so shy because you have an std?
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
