Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
