Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
