Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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