My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
