ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
