I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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