I'm drive I can fine osifer
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
