Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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