Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
