Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
