In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize