Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
