i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
