So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
