You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
