its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Boobs speak an international language.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
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